Wanna Talk Some Bullshit? The Price Of Chicken Wings Is About To Go Up

Everyone knows chicken wings are America’s most delightful, delectable, delicious food. Crunchy, juicy, saucy, spicy; they are everything you could want in one wonderful bite. Like, really. Name someone who doesn’t like chicken wings. I bet that person is a fucking chump. Do you like chicken wings? Of course you do. Because you are not a chump.

Another great things about chicken wings, as though we needed more reasons to love them, is that they are cheap. A plate of 10-12 wings costs around $10-12. Not a damn bad price at all. Except soon, they might not be so inexpensive.

That’s right, we are talking about:


It’s real. According to Grub Street, there are 50 million fewer wings on the market this year than last, which is a fucking insanely high amount of chicken wings to not be in existence. That could feed five million people. This has led to a corresponding increase in chicken wing prices. From Bloomberg.

The cost of wholesale wings sold by processors in Georgia, which sets the benchmark for the nation, has jumped 6.6 percent this month to $1.69 a pound.

Buffalo Wild Wings Inc. (BWLD), a Minneapolis-based restaurant chain with more than 1,000 stores, raised menu prices by an average of 3 percent in November, Chief Operating Officer Jim Schmidt said in a telephone interview Jan. 21. The company normally would have raised prices in February, but made the increases earlier partly because of higher wing costs, he said.

LIKE I SAID. Bullshit.

What the fuck is this world coming to?

The reason for the shortage is that we killed less chickens last year, which, I guess is good for the chickens, not dying and all, but really, fuck that.

I want my wings.