This is a medical procedure straight out of the Middle Ages, a Medieval practice that’s been lampooned on Saturday Night Live and most famously by the Monty Python bros. I’m talking of course about the practice of using leeches to suck someone’s blood out. Apparently using leeches for blood letting is having a comeback because the NYPost recently featured a story about a woman who used over 200 leeches to clean her blood, and this chick claims those leeches have made her an absolute FIEND for sex, and she also claims to have lost weight because of these leeches.
According to the Daily Mail, the London-based mother of two credits her creepy crawlers with assisting in more than 100 pounds of weight loss. Even better, the 48-year-old says, leeches have helped to enhance her sex life.
“For the first time ever,” she tells the Mail, “I am experiencing multiple orgasms. It’s wonderful.”
So attached is she to her toxin-removing “babies” that Bogatyriova encourages them to crawl inside her mouth (apparently, they help keep her gums clean), and she lets the glorified worms work their magic on leg scars. Explains the leech lady: “They have aided detoxification, helped improve my general well-being, and using them was key to my weight loss.”
Okay, leeches in your mouth? Seriously? How in the fuuuuuuck would letting a leech suck blood from your mouth ever enhance your life? Moving on…
Proof of concept came when, as students, she and her classmates needed to do leech treatments to one another. “Every day for a week, I had a leech put on my bottom for minutes,” she remembers. “It sucked out the blood, and by the end of the week my clothes felt loose. I thought it was [due to] poor washing, but I checked my weight and had lost [13 pounds].” She “was shocked.”
These days she keeps leeches on her butt for up to two hours, and has used over 200 leeches to achieve weight loss. Improving the alternative-medicine lover’s sex life requires leeches being placed inside her cervix. “It’s an area rich in blood vessels, and that means that [the leeches] remove more toxins,” says Bogatyriova, advising that women count the leeches prior to insertion. She insists that the process is painless, and that the leeches get removed with tweezers: “Suddenly I was wanting sex all the time, and I was having multiple orgasms. ”
The bloodsucking enthusiast adds: “I feel like a teenager again.”
In the Middle Ages people believed using leeches for blood letting provided curative powers, essentially washing someone’s blood and making it healthy again by forcing the body to produce new, clean blood. This was all bullshit, and it often led to death because people who were already sick couldn’t afford to lose blood and it sent them off the deep end.
I’m not saying that this woman’s putting herself in danger by using leeches, but I think there’s zero chance in hell that the leeches are actually causing this shift in her sex drive and weight loss. If anything it’s a placebo effect, but one she desperately needed apparently. The leeches probably give her the sense that she’s doing something dangerous, something risky. The same physiological effect a person gets from watching a horror movie. I do think she’s putting other people in danger though by sharing her story and promoting the use of leeches for weight loss and sexual enhancement, because I believe she’ll encourage people to use leeches who shouldn’t be blood letting at all, and it’ll put those people in danger. But hey, she’s an empowered women going through a sexual reawakening and renaissance, why shouldn’t she be allowed to tell her story, right?
Changing gears a little bit, I want to make sure that ALL OF YOU know about the all new BroBible iOS app that was launched last week. It’s 100% free to download and it’s the latest/greatest way to get all of your BroBible content, so DOWNLOAD IT FOR FREE BY CLICKING HERE!