Hazmat Team Called To Disneyland After Guests Hit With Poop
Things took a turn for the worse at Disneyland on Friday night when 17 park-goers were hit with poop. The happiest place on Earth quickly turned into the crappiest place on Earth.
It was first reported that human feces were thrown at the people, however authorities determined that fowl play was involved because it was actually goose poop. The situation was so extremely dire that people called for the Anaheim Police Department to get involved.
The shitstorm saw 11 adults and six children hit, but no one was hurt. No shit. It’s poop, not a MOAB.
Maybe the terrorists are right. Maybe our culture is too privileged, too soft, and too pampered when we call the police after a bird poops on us.