My Life In A Nutshell Is This Idiot Chick Who Won’t Stop Trying To Go Up The Down Escalator
Ever heard of “failing upwards”? That’s this chick and, chances would have it, the story of my life. Did I have good grades in college? Eh. Congrats you’re hired! Am I a good employee? Double major EH. Good to know, you can keep your job and continue to steal snacks that are easily hidden in your purse from the kitchen. I haven’t bought groceries in a month because all I do is jack food from the office and hoard it in my apartment. I’ve done almost nothing of worth in the past 5 years and you know what? It’s working out pretty well. That’s called “failing upwards” – you’re a useless piece of shit, but you’re still movin’ on up.
Kind of like this lady…but only the “failing” part. She’s not going up. She (SPOILER ALERT) quits and heads down after a few minutes. Way to not even apply yourself, ever heard of a little thing called “motivation”? Me neither. Maybe we should crack open a dictionary together over some frozen happy hour margaritas. You’re buying, I’m cheap.