Kiwi Bro With Huge Balls Roasts A Marshmallow Over An Active Volcano While Crushing A Beer


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I love volcanos. In fourth grade, I sat next to a really neat diorama of a volcano that I’d just space out looking at while the teacher read passages from James and the Giant Peach. It left a lingering effect on my psyche, especially when the Tommy Lee Jones movie Volcano came out a few years later. See, I fucking LOVE volcanos. They’re endless fascinating to me. When I was a senior in high school I got to visit Haleakalā volcano in Maui and was awe-struck.It still ranks up there as one of the best days of my life. Then I went to Yellowstone a couple years later in college and learned the whole thing is just a giant volcano waiting to explode. “That’s cool as fuck,” I said. When I lived in Colorado, I knew where every single remote hot spring was in a 100 mile radius of my homebase in Aspen. I’m the dork who dreams of going to Iceland and New Zealand to explore the many, magnificent volcanos and swim in their badass geothermal pools. Volcanos are badass.

Sometimes I ask myself why I never pursued those dreams of being a globe-trotting geologist/volcanologist/international man of mystery and then I remember: Geophysics and geochemistry is fucking hard.

Anyway, Simon Turner is a volcanologist from New Zealand. Like a total Bro, he recently trekked to the Marcum Crater in Vanuatu in the South Pacific with some marshmellows and a frosty Corona. It was Turner’s 12 trek into the crater, so he decided it’d be run to roast marshmallows over the crater’s lava lake with a long stick while crushing a beer, just like any camping trip. Here’s what his colleague Bradley Ambrose, who filmed the video, said about the journey:

“We dangled the marshmallow over the [lava] lake where the radiant heat was at its hottest, so it didn’t take too long to cook,” said Ambrose. “It ended up being one of the most perfectly cooked marshmallows I have ever tasted. Perfect and crusty on the outside without being burned — it had just the right amount of a gooey center, but without getting it all over your fingers.”

The melting point of marshmallows is right above body temperature, which is 98.6 degrees Fahrenheit, typically causing them to melt, more or less, just by putting them in your mouth. The lava lake’s temperature is more than 2,000 degrees Fahrenheit, so for the two adventurers, it was like roasting marshmallows on hyper speed.

Needless to say, the beer didn’t stay cold for very long.

[H/T: Grub Street]