You Can Now Pay Someone To Break Up With Your Girlfriend For You–If You Can’t Find Your Testicles

by 4 years ago

Breaking up sucks. Unless she banged another dude or wronged you enough to make the decision a no-brainer, it’s such a daunting task to more-or-less tell someone “you’re just not good enough for me” or “I just want to get some strange.” But you owe it to her, the relationship, and your manhood to sack up and tell her your heart is no longer in it. Or not lolz. Because an Australian service called “Sorry It’s Over” will do that for you.

Kristy Mazins, the 37-year-old creator of the service, was previously a bedside nurse, which she claims has given her the ability to use the right words in tense situations.

Kirsty told Mamamia,

“People don’t like the confrontation. People are scared of it. It’s a much needed service because it takes the fear out of breaking up.”

For just $5.50, she will send a text or email to your ex-partner to be. For an increased charge, she will even send a box of tissues or flowers. And for her premium package, she will send a human being in place of your passive-aggressive ass to cut ties with your partner.


She says her clients give her a general outline of what they want to say and she will add a little spice “if needed.”


The service is currently only available in Australia at the moment but if successful, it could makes its way over to the States.

What concerns me about this service is not so much having a complete stranger insert herself into your relationship during the most personal, emotional time, but rather the lack of a business plan in the ultra-emotional days to follow. Because those are the toughest days to combat. It’s like when you bang your shin and you have those two seconds where your brain hasn’t registered the pain yet and then FUCK! Chaz, move your fucking skateboard!! What’s the escape plan when your ex shows up to your work? Huh, Kristy? Ya, I hate to break it to ya, but I don’t think this is going to work out.

[H/T Elite Daily]


TAGSbreakupsRelationships