People Are Calling The Cops Because They’re Getting Lost In The World’s Biggest Corn Maze

Worlds Largest Corn Maze

Cool Patch Pumpkins via Facebook

The corn maze at the Cool Patch Pumpkin farm in Dixon, California was crowned the “world’s largest corn maze” back in 2007. Every year, the owners of the farm are making it bigger. It might be too big now. People aren’t coming out without help.

A few people who were lost in the maze got so worried that they called 911, even though the map they’re given when they start the maze says not to call the police.

Matt Cooley, who operates the maze, says the 63-acre maze is designed to be difficult, “but if you take your time, and follow the map, you can do it.”

I don’t care how lost I get, I’m not calling the cops. That would be the most embarrassing call of my life and I’ve called people to say some embarrassing stuff.
“Help! I’m stuck in corn! No, corn isn’t stuck in me, I’m stuck in a corn maze! Describe my surrounds? Sure. THERE’S FUCKING CORN EVERYWHERE!”

Cooley says that on average, it usually takes people two hours to make their way through. Without any wrong turns, it’s about 3 miles long.

What an awful way to spend a weekend. I’d rather apple pick. At least that shit ends.