Losing cocaine is the worst. It’s a triple whammy. Not only is it money down the drain, you no longer have cocaine. Additionally, you have to spend more money to buy new cocaine. That’s three terrible things, all at once.
The good folks at the Crewe Police Department in Virginia understand your pain. That’s why, when they found some cocaine that someone had clearly dropped on the sidewalk outside the Super Dollar, they took to Facebook to find the owner.
In part, the post reads: “If you mistakenly dropped your cocaine today and were at the Super Dollar, please contact us. We would like to talk with you further about your property.”
The author of the post, Detective Ella Turner, sounds super chill. From The Washington Post:
“We’re not degrading the seriousness of the drug problem,” Turner said. But … “They’ll pay attention if we put it like that,” Turner said. “If we’re humorous, that can get the ball rolling.”
Unfortunately, she said she can’t just give the cocaine back.
“Would you really give it back?” someone asked on Facebook. “NO!” the department responded.
“We will not give you back your illegal narcotics. The narcotics are weighed, photographed and placed into an evidence locker to be destroyed upon the approval of the courts.” The response goes on, “We distribute lots of things such as lollipops to our favorite kids, and tickets to lead-footed friends, but we do not re-distribute your drugs. We hope this clarifies our post a bit more.”
Probably not gonna get anyone to come forward with that attitude.