This Psycho Woman Who Wrote Two Pages Of Ridiculously Bullshit House Rules Is The Shittiest Roommate You’ll Ever Meet

Every college student out there has had the “joy” of living with a roommate at least one point during their college career. Whether it was bunking with some random person in your freshman dorm or getting an apartment off campus with a bunch of friends, you’ve come to realize by this point that people suck. Doesn’t matter if they’re your best friends from high school or some kid you met literally 30 seconds ago when you first stepped into your dorm, chances are that they’re going to suck to live with. Now, that’s not because they’re weird and flick boogers onto your pillow when you’re not looking (which they totally do, by the way); it’s because this is your first time living away from your parents and you probably don’t know how to “play nice” when it comes to living with others.

Sure your Mom washed all your stanky laundry and cleaned your crusty mac and cheese bowl when you were finished eating, but yo momma ain’t here no more, is she? Answer: no. So when your roommate decides that eating an entire 1 lb. box of Tootsie Rolls is not only a good idea, but that throwing the wrappers on the ground and around the room afterwards is a stroke of GENIUS, you’ll know that it’s time to find another roommate who isn’t a goddamn slob.

However, sometimes your roommate is perfectly neat, respectful, quiet…but still a fucking psychopath.

This is one of those times.

A 28-year-old man living in Australia was “lucky” enough to find a roommate who is not only quiet and respectful like mentioned above, but also a completely anal twat. Poor guy had been living in the apartment for four months already when his roommate handed him this two-page living contract out of NOWHERE:


According to Metro:

The guy who received it explained: ‘I was aware that she had been planning to draft a house agreement, I had no idea that it would be this full on. When I got it I was so taken a back at how intense it was’

He went on: ‘It wasn’t even just being given the contract, but she felt she had to explain it to me. We must have spent 45 minutes going through it line by line, she elaborated on everything in detail.’

You might be thinking that even though the contract is thorough (to put it mildly) it doesn’t necessarily mean it’ll be enforced…and you would be wrong. The 28-year-old stated that now that the rules have been delivered, things have started going to shit.

I got a text last night from her because I was watching TV past 10pm, which said ‘it’s bedtime”

He went on: ‘It’s just such a strange situation, really crazy. I’ve tried my hardest to accommodate her, but I think I’m done.’

Via Metro

When your Nazi-imposed bedtime is 10:00 and you’re over the age of 18, you know it’s time to dip the fuck out.

[H/T Metro, header image via Shutterstock]