Everyone likes to think that they’re good in bed, right? But the sad truth is that a lot of people suck. Like really, really suck…which is okay! As my parents told me and I’m sure yours told you, there’s always room for improvement and no matter how good you are at something, someone out there is better at it than you. Most people take this information in stride as a reason to improve and go about their merry ways, but one Oliver Ilic, apparently can’t handle the truth.
Oliver Ilic, 22, was told that he was no good in bed so it is claimed he mutilated himself then threw the remains in the bin.
He is alleged to have told doctors that he had a small appendage and cited that as the reason why his girlfriend was no use to him.
Ilic contacted emergency services when he could not stop the bleeding and was taken to hospital in the east Macedonian town town of Kocani.
Police searched his house and discovered the severed organ in a bin after it had been cut off with a single swipe from a razor blade which was also lying in the bin.
Doctors were initially unable to re-attach his penis but he was then transferred to the capital, Skopje, where it was reunited with his body following five hours of surgery.
As of yet doctors don’t know if Oliver’s penis will be able to ever function properly again, in which case it seems that Oliver has permanently sealed his fate as sucking in bed forever and ever. Good move there dude.