Startups have changed the way we all live, and will continue to do so for the rest of our lives, and for those beyond us. The startup is the company that comes in with a technological advancement that revolutionizes something that already existed. Most revolve around communication, i.e. social media apps, while others are focused on business practices.
They’re designed for you to share your life and your thoughts. They’re designed to streamline your purchasing power. They’re designed…actually, come to think of it, this whole startup phenomenon is a joke. These startups don’t really want to help you with any of that. The whole business model they’ve been founded on is just a worldwide excuse for people get their creep on. The inspiration behind all this, while founders will deny it, clearly comes from one most anonymous group of people.
Let me explain a few…
Cool idea. Getting every thought of people you may not even know right at your finger tips? How great is that? Spying in on people’s lives from the comfort of near anonymity? Guess who mastered that concept first? Peeping Toms! Safely peering in on the lives of others is not something Twitter came up with–the minds behind this operation were clearly just looking for an excuse to be total CREEPS!
You know where this idea originated from? Polaroid cameras, duh! Take a photo and instantly share it with your friends with a little white space to write down something cute. Can anybody else see the injustice here? Really though, the mastery of the Polaroid camera is owed to the geniusness (read: terrifyingly weirdness) of Peeping Toms. That’s right, Instagram never would’ve happened if it weren’t for the tireless effort of Peeping Toms and their Polaroid cameras snapping pics around the world. Can we write that down in the history books, please? Or at the very least in that little caption white space of our next Instagrams!
Looking at people and imagining doing horrendously sexual things to them in real life? You didn’t used to have to download an app for that! Peeping Toms have been doing that from backyard windows for centuries. Millennials think they’re cutting edge, but this concept has been in practice for years. Thank you Peeping Toms, for your service – and hot tip for finding sexy singles in the surrounding area.
Really? It’s a live video update of people’s lives, but they don’t necessarily even know you’re watching. Yeah, it’s pretty obvious Peeping Toms already mastered that concept. Where was the venture backing from angel investors when they so desperately needed it? This is a crime, well so is being a Peeping Tom, but that’s neither here nor there! This particular injustice against PT’s needs to be brought to justice.
Photos and videos are sent to people watching from the comfort of their own privacy (whether it’s from the bushes is your own call), while being all up in others’ personal space, then they vanish into thin air as if they never existed. Guess who originated the idea of seeing intimate moments unnoticed then vanishing before getting caught? PEEPING TOMS! Reparations are in order here, sheeple!
Here’s a thing that wouldn’t exist if Peeping Toms didn’t have to quietly talk to themselves when being all creepy. Keeping a secret is the one mastery that Peeping Toms are known for. Due credit needs to be given here! Whisper would be a great place to anonymously give said credit coincidentally enough.
Need to find a home that satisfies your every need? Peeping Toms never needed a phone app for that! Just take a peek in the window and see what’s up! The minds at Trulia are truly a bunch of hacks if you ask me.
Do we have to spell this one out for you? Peeping Toms were the first to amass photo albums of strangers and look at them in secret. Hey Zuckerberg, you owe the Winklevoss twins nothing and Peeping Toms around the globe EVERYTHING!
Gaining access into people’s living space for a discounted rate? Sure AirBnb has cornered that market and made millions, but they clearly, shamelessly stole this idea from Peeping Toms that have been doing this same thing for free from just outside the actual home. AirBnb is just a greedier version of the Peeping Tom mantra.
Turns out MySpace is supposed to be said from the second person’s point of view impersonating someone in the first person. As in, you were just all up in everyone else’s space, so to speak. Tom was the original internet Peeping Tom, but at least he kept his namesake. Long live Tom!
This article is in no way condoning Peeping Tom-ism, but if you’ve ever used any of these tech companies’ products, there’s a little hint of that inside you. Take a long, hard look in the mirror and refrain yourself from taking a mirror selfie, because, well now you know exactly the basis of where that photo may be headed. You’re welcome for this sad reality that’s been laid out before you.