This Video Is the Most Millennial, Hipster Bullshit You Will Ever See

You know what’s hard? Being in your 20s. That is because while the world treats you as a fully-formed adult, you aren’t. You haven’t had enough life experiences to be able to handle everything reality throws at you.

That’s okay.

You know what is not hard? Being in your 20s in 2014. There is nothing specific to this date that makes it harder or easier emotionally. Sure, you have Facebook now to keep tabs on your exes, but so does everyone else. You are having the same shared-world experience as literally everyone else, the same as kids in their 20s in 1840 did. Or kids in 2002.

Which is what makes this video by Doug Gautraud so making-me-want-to-commit-suicide-feeling-inducing. Doug’s upset because his grandfathers farmed the lands and sailed the seas and all he does is tweet. He wasn’t experiencing the world, he thought.

So he bought a cliche. I mean a motorcycle. No, wait. I do mean cliche, because there is zero chance this dude–with all his talk about hard work and tangible objects–didn’t just finish Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenence and thought this would solve his life problems.

But Doug’s mom didn’t like him having a motorcycle. That’s when he realized he could provide for his mother. Provide her with comfort. Provide her with peace of mind by selling his motorcycle. So she wouldn’t have to worry about him.

Who did our intrepid, fearless 20-something find to purchase his hog? Watch the video and find out.

No, don’t watch the video. I don’t want you to have to do that. He sold it to his mother. For $1,850. Right after he said all he’d done with his life is take. He took $1,850 from the one lady he wanted to give to.

And then made this emosh video about it.

Yay.

That said, it’s a well-done video. You followed Phaedrus’s principles on Quality. Good for you.

And people like craft beer because it is delicious. Not because it’s a more authentic beer. It’s beer.

People who like straight-razor shaves are awful people who shouldn’t exist.


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