Why Are We All Such Pussies?


Life is short. Actually, it’s shorter than short — it’s nothing more than a blip on Eternity’s radar. So why are we such pussies? Yes, I said “we.”

I don’t care how cool you think you are or how confident you sincerely feel; I know you’ve bitched out at least once in the past and will have countless opportunities to do so in the future. For as rational as we pretend to be, this is totally irrational behavior. Nobody truly knows how we got here or where we are going. You know what this means? It means our lives are found money — an unexpected rebate check from a cosmic IRS. Many of us will play it safe and dump our biological currencies into a savings bond, but let me ask: If you die before the bond matures, what the fuck was the point? Nobody leaves a poker tournament with chips on the table. Why is such logic quarantined to a card game? More importantly, how do we set such logic free?

For starters, I think we should go back to our roots and hunt. And no, I’m not talking loincloths and spears. Evolution and supermarkets eradicated those mentalities long ago — at least in our society. With one life to live, we should be hunting something less tangible but more fulfilling. We should be hunting experiences.


Now, don’t get it twisted. I’m not telling teenagers to shoot heroin nor am I advising those in debt to rob banks. The risks involved with such endeavors far outweigh the rewards. Is a 1 percent chance at $10,000,000 really worth a 99 percent chance of life in prison? I don’t think so. However, that doesn’t mean you can’t pick your spots. If you’re 105-years-old, have two weeks to live, and always wanted to try heroin, what the fuck are you waiting for? At 105, the risks associated with hard drug use, such as ruining your career or destroying your family, have been thrown out the window. The risk is minimized, so enjoy the reward!

This, of course, is an extreme situation, but the mentality applies to all walks of life. Not going to talk to that pretty girl at the bar? Why not? You literally have NOTHING to lose and EVERYTHING to gain. But you already know this. You’ve known this for a while. You’ve crunched the numbers time and time again and know exactly what to do. But more than often you don’t do. And that simply won’t do.

So why do we refrain from risky behavior, even when the risk justifies the reward? What are we afraid of? Like cocaine, fear is one helluva drug. The hunter, however, doesn’t dwell on fear for he hasn’t the time. The hunter is too busy surviving. The hunter knows exactly what he wants. The hunter exhibits patience. The hunter never settles. The hunter is always prepared. The hunter doesn’t shoot too soon nor wait too long. When the ripest moment presents itself, the hunter strikes.

Maybe he scores the kill and maybe he doesn’t. Regardless, he tried his best and is proud — at least for the day.

By viewing experience as fuel for the soul, the fearless hunter in all of us will undoubtedly emerge — not by choice, but by necessity. The hunt itself is not the challenge. The challenge is realizing you’re already in the jungle. Such a challenge is not easily overcome, but do yourself a favor; stay armed, and no matter what, keep one in the chamber. You never know when the opportunity of a lifetime will enter your sights.

BroBible Newsletter - The best sports and culture news directly to your inbox

* indicates required