How Dumb Do You Have To Be To Get Your Shit Wrecked By A Stationary Ikea Table? About As Dumb As This Guy

This guy deserves the trip to ER room that’s coming to him and I don’t even feel bad. Clearly that table isn’t going to break with a body slam like that, because something something physics something something evenly applied force over a large surface area something something he’s fucked. To be fair, it is a crappy little shistain piece of furniture from Ikea, so I can see how you’d assume even a gentle fart in the breeze would make it collapse into a million plastic splinters…but at the same time that doesn’t mean I’m volunteering to hump it into the ground. I’m smarter than that, aka I have at least 3 friends dumb enough to be willing to try this in exchange for pennies. PENNIES, guys, PENNIES!