The Best Football Played At The Big House This Year Was A Soccer Match

In all disclosure: I am an alumnus of Michigan State University. I am “Little Brother” and I am very disappointed in my big sister, The University of Michigan. As a Spartan, I grew up with embarrassing loses in September, and had to suffer through all of the Victors’ victories, hoping that one day that will be our program. Longing for the day where Wolverines are saying, “wait for basketball season”. Well, it looks like that time has come.

Big Blue took another beating today losing to Minnesota 30-14, dropping its record to 2-3. Not the kind of season they were hoping for, especially looking at Desmond Howard’s pre-season power rankings, which put the Wolverines at 6 (seriously, ESPN is paying the guy big bucks for this kind of clown work).

Minnesota joins Utah and Notre Dame in defeating the maize and blue in ugly games this season. In its losses to Notre Dame and Utah, the U of M offense failed to score a single touchdown. It’s safe to say that the best football played at the Big House this year was a soccer match, when Manchester United faced Real Madrid back in August. Today we saw veteran Senior Devon Gardner take second-seat to Shane Morris, and the future doesn’t look very bright. I want them to succeed, I really do. I miss the days where the game was something to look forward to—anybody’s game, a nail-biter that comes down to a last-second play. Let’s get that back. There are a lot of changes to be made in order to return the program to its former glory, but it can be done.

First, get a real quarterback. Devon Gardner and Denard Robinson are not true quarterbacks. Mobile QBs shine in college football today, but there’s a difference between a dual-threat QB and a really fast guy who knows how to throw. Nothing symbolizes Robinson’s game better than his untied shoes. Once you get a quarterback, you can go ahead and fire Hoke. Hire Jim Harbaugh. Hell, hire any coach who wears a headset.

Looking ahead, all that Michigan can do is bite the bullet it shot itself in the foot with. They still have to make the trip to face a silent but deadly Rutgers squad, square off against my Spartans in East Lansing, and take on The Ohio State University in Columbus. Ouch. Better years are ahead, and I have no doubt the program can turn it around.

Until then, it may be shitty football but for the price of two Cokes, you might as well catch a game.

Note: If UofM beats MSU and you want to be a hater, feel free to send your trash talk to @CortFreeman