An Ohio couple has filed a lawsuit against the author of “A Gronking To Remember,” an erotic soft-core porn book about Patriots tight end and one-man party Rob Gronkowski, for using their engagement picture on the cover without the couple’s permission. They are also suing Amazon, Barnes & Nobles, and Amazon.com, because fuck it, why not.
John and Jane Roe (aliases) say the photo pictured on the cover of the book written by Lacey Noonan was taken “as part of their engagement journey leading towards their wedding,” according to the Boston Herald.
The lawsuit states,
“The subject matter of the book ‘A Gronking to Remember’ is less than tasteful and is offensive. The use of the plaintiffs’ image has held them up to ridicule and embarrassment. This outrageous connection has been further aggravated when the book with the plaintiffs’ image has been reproduced in the media nationwide.”
Less that tasteful? You must be talking about the wrong book:
“I’ll never forget the first time I saw Gronk spike a football. The unrivaled power of his touchdown dance: ‘The Gronk.’ It jettisoned jiggling ribbons of electric jelly through my body and melted my knees like two pads of margarine.”
The couple claims they were not compensated in any way and is asking the court to award them “any profits derived from and attributable to the unauthorized use, or $10,000, compensatory damages of $25,000, attorneys fees, court costs, expenses and treble damages.”
Try to take yourselves more seriously. You can’t. Isn’t this what you wanted when you incessantly posted your engagement pics on Facebook? Attention. And now, thanks to sexual deviant, Lacey Noonan, you’re loving photo has been seen by millions. Granted, the married chick in the book wants nothing more than for Gronk to take her to Pound Town, but that’s just smoke in mirrors. So you want to squeeze a little money out of it? Fine. But don’t pretend for one second like you aren’t flattered.