Greg Olsen Reveals The Reason Why His ‘Madden 20’ Player Looks Absolutely Nothing Like Him

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EA Sports did Greg Olsen dirty.

Olsen has been a force in the league for over a decade, securing three Pro Bowl nods and the Bears’ coveted Brian Piccolo Award, given to one rookie and one veteran per season who best exemplifies the courage, loyalty, teamwork, dedication and sense of humor of the late Brian Piccolo.

The people at EA sports evidently do not care.

If they did, they wouldn’t have let this travesty pass for Olsen’s digital player in Madden 20.

Very bad. D-

NFL Network came to Panthers camp Sunday and asked the 34-year-old about it, to which he took some responsibility for the disgrace.

“A couple years ago down at the Pro Bowl they (EA Sports) were doing head scans and I guess I didn’t do it. For whatever reason, I was tied up with something else and didn’t do it,” Olsen told NFL Network. “Since then they never asked me to do it again.”

“I look like Nick Swisher,” Olsen quipped. “I’d prefer it look like me, I’ll be honest.”

The Nick Swisher call could not be more spot-on.


Apparently, Madden has created an updated version of the Panthers tight end. The public will not accept anything shy of a spitting image. This is the abomination the folks at EA came up with for the 2.0 version.

Olsen 2.0 looks like he chugs dip spit and rocks a bumper sticker on his lifted Chevy that reads “My other ride is your mom.”

Olsen was showed the updated version of himself and responded with: “Generic white guy?”


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Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.