Very Hot Olympic Hopeful Fails Spectacularly With Javelin Throw In U.S. Olympic Trials

Despite stroking one nightly, I’m far from an expert on the sport of javelin-ing. I know that one must throw a sharp stick as far as they can without impaling a spectator, the javelin must be thrown overhand, and the thrower cannot turn his/her back on the throw to produce more torque. That is the extent of my knowledge. Despite my superficial understanding of the sport, I know for a fact that this toss by Utah State’s Chari Hawkins does not produce the best result.

Hawkins, a former Mountain West Conference champion in the event, threw a duck in Saturday’s javelin event in the heptathlon for the U.S. Olympic track & field trials. The woman’s world record for javelin throw is 72.28 feet, set in 2008. This toss fell far short.

When it’s your anniversary but you drink too much whiskey at the celebration dinner…

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Chari finished 15th in the trials, but remains #1 in our hearts.

Olympic Athletes Winning At Instagram

[h/t Deadspin]

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Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.