This Just In: Jameis Winston Still Loves Crab Legs, Requires A Grocery Store Chaperone To Purchase Them



Reigning Heisman winner, national champion, and still undefeated starting quarterback Jameis Winston apparently requires a chaperone these days to buy crab legs.

I guess it makes sense that the administration (and Jameis) wouldn’t want to risk someone taking pictures of him alone holding crab legs at a grocery store, but still, why not just send someone in to get them for you? Why even put yourself in the position where somebody (like the person below) is going to snap a pic and tweet it for all the world to see?




Do I think Jameis has a right to crab legs like any other human being? Yes.
Do I think Jameis should be eating stone crab instead of king crab? Yes.
Do I think Jameis is the greatest quarterback in college football and FSU will go undefeated again this season and win back-to-back national championships? The answer is obviously YES.

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