Just when I thought being a Cleveland sports fan is depressing as all hell, I find a crazy stat like this on the Internet that reminds me that, oh yeah, at least we still have LeBron James. For Philadelphia sports fans, though, you aren’t as lucky—and this is about to be the most depressing thing you hear all day.
Swallow this information and see your reaction, Philly fans—between the Eagles, Sixers and Flyers, you have ZERO wins in the month of November at home, going a combined 0-10. That’s right, NONE! Talk about shitty, right?
Even with all the talk about Chip Kelly and his explosive and revamped Eagles’ offense, they’ve still failed to fly to a victory this month at the Linc. The Flyers are 0-3 this month on their home ice and are giving up goals left and right while failing to find the back of the net themselves. The Sixers? Well, besides not knowing how many fucking players belong on a court, they’re off to an 0-12 start and have a roster that makes your pickup team’s roster look like a fucking NBA All-Star squad.
Go ahead and tell me that, “in defense” of the Eagles, they’ve “only” played two games this month—having a bye in Week 8 this month—but that should only require you to pick up a double shot and take it straight to the lips, because that team is awful.
November is supposed to be a month for thanks, you know, with that whole Thanksgiving holiday next week. But after not seeing a sports victory by one of its teams in 26 days at home, there’s not much to be thankful for in Philly right now—so just keep on idolizing Rocky to get you sports fix.