The Greens At The U.S. Open Already Look As Patchy As Tiger Woods’ Hair — That’s Not A Good Thing

General Views of Chambers Bay Golf Course

David Cannon -- Getty Images

That headline is courtesy of Kyle Koster. I refuse to take credit for it. Mainly because I think one day Tiger and I will be best friends. That friendship may not start today or tomorrow — gonna take him a minute to forgive me for using that headline — but one fucking day, Tiger and JC will be boys. Just hanging out, shooting the shit and swapping stories about banging Perkins waitresses while we fire 85s from the white tees. After the round we’ll hit the 19th hole for a couple turkey clubs and talk about how easily those 85s could have been 74s. It’ll be great.

Now that the blame of who wrote that mean headline is out of the way, LOOK AT THE GREENS AT CHAMBERS BAY! JESUS.


We knew the course would be brown and hard and fast and not visually appealing to the television audience, but we at least expected it to be playable. That picture is telling a slightly different story. Of course it’s only one photo but it’s also only Monday and the course is only going to dry out more as the week goes on. By Thursday I am expecting a dustbowl. And also a goddamn bloodbath on the scoreboard. I genuinely hope the winning score is 37 over par.


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