This Cheesy Country Song Will Convince You the United States Will Win the World Cup

If the only thing holding you back from embracing the upcoming World Cup was the lack of a pro-American country song focusing heavily on Alexi Lalas, today is your lucky day. Such an artistic offering has been released to the masses and it is certainly a thing which was made.

Now, don’t get me wrong. When taken individually, the elements are enjoyable. Lalas is one of the better analysts on television and can grow a majestic beard at the drop of a hat. Cheesy country music practically runs every automobile south of the Mason-Dixon line. And the World Cup is the most exciting international competition. But combined … ooof. Not something you’re going to particularly enjoy.

Perhaps the inclusion of some hero miners would have turned the tide, but then again, those don’t exactly grow on trees.

[H/T: SB Nation]