Venezuelan Dude Dubbed The ‘World’s Worst Skier’ Enters The World Championships For His Country And I Swear I’m Not Laughing



Imagine living your whole life as an unmarried Mormon–no sex, no porn, no release–and then one day being thrown onto a gang bang set of Brazzers, next to big names like Lexington Steele and your mother. Imagine how dreadfully awful you’d perform.

Now apply that same scenario to Adrian Solano and cross country skiing.

Solano, a 22-year-old from Venezuela, has been dubbed the “world’s worst skier” after his cringeworthy performance at the Nordic world ski championships in Lahti, Finland. In his opening event, Solano finished the first 3.5 kilometers in 39 minutes 37 seconds, which was roughly the same amount of time it took the other competitors to complete the entire 10-kilometer course, according to the New York Times. After the first 3.5 kilos, he called it quits.

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Solano was at an extreme disadvantage against some of the world’s top cross country skiers, seeing as until arriving at the competition this week, Solano had never even SEEN snow, never mind competed on it. The 22-year-old cook had trained for five hours a day on weekends for the competition on on wheels instead of skis in the hot Venezuelan sun.

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In his second event, the 1.6-kilometer cross-country sprint, Solano just aimed at finishing. He did, but finished 156th out of 156.

“We have a success culture that sports is only great if you succeed,” Valavuori said. “I want to get rid of that. You get some wins, you get some losses. But there are so many other things in sports. It’s all about the story.”

His long-term goal is to compete in the 2022 Winter Olympics.

[h/t The New York Times]

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Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.