I Didn’t Give A Sloppy Shit About Nintendo’s 3DS But After Watching The Official ‘Majora’s Mask 3D’ Trailer I NEED IT

by 3 years ago

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My entire childhood can be summed up with a slightly beat-up Nintendo 64 whose reset button is permanently jammed and a single Majora’s Mask cartridge. I didn’t have a lot of friends, and the friends I did have were bitchy little 3rd grade slunts who got power trips out of making the chubby girl who couldn’t run (me, of course) start as “It” for tag every day at recess. I wasn’t athletic, I wasn’t “cool,” and my haircut made me look like a little boy. The only thing I was actually good at were video games, and Majora’s Mask was my shit.

Did I know anything about the Zelda series when I first popped that golden little cartridge into my N64? Nah, I was like 9 and hadn’t even figured out my times tables yet, but that game was the sole reason I made friends with almost every single dude in my class because I used to bring the guide to class for the 20 minutes of silent reading we had every day. Did you know that video game guides bring 3rd grade boys flocking to your desk? Well now you do, and that’s how I managed to tell my shitty friends to go and fuck themselves (translated to 3rd grader, I probably said something like “You’re stupid, go away,” but that doesn’t sound as good now does it?) and made new friends who weren’t assholes.

I wasn’t planning on buying a 3DS, mostly because I’m poor and Nintendo doesn’t accept Monopoly money in exchange for their products. But when I watched this trailer…it’s not that I feel “obligated” to buy the game, it’s more that this game is my childhood in a nutshell, and that’s not something you can just say “No” to. It’s what I spent hours every day playing and how I transformed myself from the chubby little girl at recess who couldn’t catch anyone she was playing tag with to the tomboy who could hang with the guys in class. Even if I never open the box and it just sits on a shelf somewhere collecting dust, I’m buying this game.

Oh, and it looks fucking beautiful to boot.


TAGS3DSmajora's maskNintendoNintendo 3DSVideo gamesZelda

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