Painfully Jealous Michigan Students Vandalized Sparty After Repeated Athletic Embarrassments


Michigan State’s Sparty statue was vandalized with disgusting maize and blue paint overnight. Heroic crews were able to scrub the vile substance off the pristine monument to excellence before the sun rose.


Because Spartans will.

The terribly done paint job is par for the course considering the Ann Arbor’s institution commitment to failure over the last several years.

MSU’s 4-2 baseball victory over the Wolverines in Detroit yesterday was clearly the straw that broke the weak backs of these butthurt terrorists.

Combine that disappointment with a bowless football campaign (including a 35-11 humiliation to so-called Little Brother) and a basketball season without a postseason tournament and you can almost begin to see why the vandals felt they needed to do something.

It must have been awful for these delinquents to watch the Spartans breeze to their second consecutive Top-5 football finish (and fourth consecutive bowl victory). It must have been torture for them to sit helpless as Tom Izzo piloted a ragtag crew to an improbable Final Four. Again.

That’s the kind of pain a simple man in khaki pants can’t cure all by himself.

So they lashed out. They punched up. They came at the king and, judging by the splatter, did a lot of missing.

Better luck next time, guys.

And I say that because you’ll need all the luck you can get when Mark Dantonio and crew roll into town this fall.

One can only imagine the lengths the vandals would have gone too if they respected Michigan State as a real rival.

Good thing they’re content looking down their nose while looking up at the unfavorable scoreboard.

[H/T: The State News]