If the government really wanted to get on the good side of the American people, it would start looking into the price of alcohol at sporting events and music festivals. Nothing kills a buzz quicker than having to shell out the amount you would normally pay for a six pack on a single beer or spending the equivalent of a fifth (or a handle, depending on your standards) on a watered down vodka soda.
If you’re poor (or want to protest the gross unregulation of concentrated monopolies), you have a couple of choices. The first is not drinking, which is simply not an option for many people. The second is figuring out a way to sneak things into the venue, which all too often involves duct taping things way too close to your groin. Thankfully, one guy managed to figure out a way to get a Nalgene bottle’s worth of vodka into Electric Zoo a couple of weeks back that didn’t involve ripping out copious amounts of body hair upon entry.
Alex Diamond took a trip to New York City’s Randall’s Island in the dead of night to bury a package into the ground at a predetermined spot three weeks before the festival began. He documented the entire process on Facebook, including that sweet, sweet recovery:
As someone who has smuggled alcohol into a countless number of places, I can say this is one of the more foolproof methods I’ve found— it definitely has a better success rate than trying to sneak a fifth of vodka into a racetrack via a giant sandwich. It’s only a matter of time until drug cartels are knocking down Diamond’s door to ask him for tips.
Shout out to draconian drinking laws/the spirit of capitalism for showing us creativity know no bounds.