Costco Has Sh*tcanned Kirkland Signature Light Beer And The World Is A Darker Place Because Of It
While the date on my license would suggest I still have a long way to go before I’m officially old, my appreciation for the music of Steely Dan, a sufficiently challenging crossword puzzle, and a new pair of socks would argue otherwise.
Sure, I might have more in common with a beaten-down father of three than someone in their late 20s, but if having an undying love for Costco is wrong, I don’t want to be right.
A couple of years ago, my life was turned upside down when I discovered I’d been living within walking distance to a Costco whose existence I wasn’t previously aware of.
I’ve been making up for lost time ever since and the warehouse has been bringing joy into my life in the form of cheap hot dogs, free samples, and unjustifiably purchased 48-packs of Ferrero Rocher.
I’m proud to call myself a Kirkland Man, and as a result, it pains me greatly to be the person to bring you some terrible news concerning the loss of a beloved family member: the ever-loyal Kirkland Signature Light beer.
According to The Takeout, Costco has made the difficult decision to discontinue Kirkland Signature Light, which had a devoted following among the kind of people who bust out a calculator to maximize their dollar when shopping for booze.
A quick look at Untappd shows Kirkland Signature Light wasn’t exactly a critical darling, so while beer nerds might not be shedding a tear, this is a dark, dark day for anyone who could care less how something tastes when you can get almost 50 cans of it for $10.
Is this what gentrification feels like? I don’t know who to blame here so I’m just going to say millennials did this. I think that’s what you’re supposed to do these days.