The Internet Is Losing It Over This Deranged Couple Who Don’t Sleep On The Same Side Of The Bed Every Night
At various points in pretty much all of our lives we have run into that couple who do things just a little differently.
Maybe they wear matching outfits or sit on the same side of the table when they eat in a booth. Perhaps they do other weird things like share gum (after its been chewed) or use pet nicknames for one another (in public). The point is, some people just want to watch the world burn.
Jeff Stein, a reporter at the Washington Post, knows one of these couples and recently revealed that they do something that can only be described as straight-up psychopathic behavior.
“Several months ago, a couple we are friends with said they don’t sleep on the same side of the bed every night. As in, every night when they get into bed, they don’t know who will sleep on which side. Still blows my mind,” he wrote on Twitter.
Stein continued this thread with a few thoughts and observations.https://twitter.com/jetpack/status/1155075199634739202 https://twitter.com/jetpack/status/1155562864893149184
I’m sorry. I don’t care how many nightstands they have, this sleeping arrangement is the type of thing a serial killer couple would do. I’m not alone in this opinion either.
I broke up with someone who wanted to do this— politics and poetry and pandemic prose (@rebelpioneer) July 27, 2019
You had no choice, really.— Webbbie 🐝 (@webbbieone) July 28, 2019
Agreed. What kind of hell do they expect you to live in? JFC.— Sheri Yasuna, Ph.D. (@SassyPsychDoc) July 28, 2019
Bold of you to admit you’re friends with serial killers publicly.— Alanah Pearce (@Charalanahzard) July 28, 2019
How can you be sure you'll have access to your chapstick? Your water? Your KLEENEX?!— Grace Pritchard Burson (@BursonGrace) July 28, 2019
There's only one conclusion to be drawn: your friends are serial killers.— Adrian ''Kenard'' Wapcaplet (@AdrianWapcapIet) July 27, 2019
I’ve been trying to find a hole in this reply for hours. Pretty airtight.— SonOfBetsy (@SonOfBetsy) July 28, 2019
Do they switch their chargers? Books? Pillows? Does no one use CPAPs? This is giving me anxiety.— 🏳️🌈Krysti the Human Incubator🏳️🌈 (@TheRuntSquad) July 27, 2019
No doubt about it.
Hi. Your friends are murderers and they can't remember which side of the bed hides the floorboard covering the telltale heart of their last victim.— Sharky 🦈 (@FailShark) July 27, 2019
This is triggering.— Lin Humphrey, Ph.D. (@LinHumphrey) July 27, 2019
This. This is why I’m on Twitter.— Polly Bruno (@pollygolightly) July 28, 2019