Gabrielle Union Tosses Twitter Into A Frenzy After Claiming She’s ‘Got Somethin’ For Dwyane Wade After His Huge Game

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Last night, Dwyane Wade stepped into a time machine that took him back to 2009 a delivered a 28-point performance in just 26 minutes to snap the Sixers 17 game win streak and tie the series up at one a piece. His stellar performance sent tingles through the veins of his lovely wife Gabrielle Union. After the game, Union sent this tweet out:

Now, if you don’t consider the context surrounding the tweet, Gabrielle could have just about anything waiting for D-Wade upon his arrival home: a quiche, season 1 of Young Sheldon on DVD, a puppy, you get the picture. But, lets consider what Union said six months back on Sway’s Universe.

“While a lot of women do enjoy providing fellatio, for sure, there needs to be some cunnilingus,” she told the hosts.

“And then ask him to eat your ass,” she said.

“if you’re going to be offering blow jobs willy nilly there should be some pleasure you experience in return. It’s only fair.”

The actress went on to say that it was only fair to reciprocate the act of ass eating and that although most men deny their appreciation for getting their salad tossed, that doesn’t line up with reality.

So, with the added context, it’s natural to assume that Gabrielle Union was finna do some butt activities with her loving husband. Or, at least that’s what Twitter thought.

Good game, Dwyane. Now pull down your pants and grab your ankles.

Matt Keohan Avatar
Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.