Ladies like bad boys.
This is exactly why I still use my old roommate’s Netflix password and claimed more deductions than I should have on my taxes this year. Young and reckless. You wouldn’t make it one day in my
hood affluent suburb because they’re building a Bloomingdale’s and construction traffic is just a nightmare.
When my grandmother asks me why I’m not married yet, I tell her I’m already married to the streets, but she doesn’t get it because she’s fucking old and straight-edge.
The real reason I stay single is because I haven’t found the Bonnie to my Clyde.
That changes today,
The Twitter account Mugshawtys has amassed nearly 200,000 followers for posting mugshots of girls who never talked to me in high school and have since broken the law.
“A lot of people send me their own mugshots — I get probably 15 to 20 plus [direct messages] a day of different ones. A lot of what I post is submissions.”
A Saints tattoo. The irony.
I’ll take my chances. There’s risk involved in every relationship.
No license? That’s cool, I’ll come to you. Leaving literally right now.
That’s a happy mugshot. I want whatever strain she was smokin.
Ok, I think I found my wife. Bye.