Bartender Shares What It Really Means When They Don’t Ask You For An ID—You Might Get Your Feelings Hurt

Is there a better feeling than being well over the legal drinking age and getting carded? Bonus points if you’re with friends, right? But perhaps that means when you don’t get carded, life has caught up to you.

For most people, getting carded at a bar or club is something you eventually age out of. Gray roots, sensible shoes, and reading glasses announce your generation with a degree of accuracy. Aging gracefully is an art, so there’s one thing a Chicago bartender is cautioning against doing.

Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell

TikToker @babylovee650 posted a TikTok about two women who came into her bar. “One lady looks like she’s in her late 20s to late 30s,” observes the bartender. But the other woman, according to the bartender, looks well past the age of being ID’d. She says, “The other lady looks like she is clearly over the age of 50. She can’t be no younger than 45–on my life.”

What happens next is explained in the text of the clip: “If a bartender don’t ask to see an ID, don’t pull it out.”

She says the older woman, whom she’s calling Veronica to protect her identity, “pulls out her ID , and that ID says that she’s only four years older than I am.”

The bartender does not look older than 30.

Then she speaks directly to Veronica: “I don’t know what kind of stress you got going on in your life, sweeties, but I really, really hope that there’s nothing but blessings in your future.”

Next, she revises her age estimate upward, saying Veronica “genuinely looked 60. Like, what the f—- you pulling out your ID for?”

The video has been viewed over 75,800 times.

‘We Have To ID EVERYONE’

The solution to who gets ID’d and who doesn’t at some places is democratic but not flattering.

“At my job we have to ID EVERYONE no matter how ‘old’ they look and if they don’t have it they can’t drink even if they look 70,” says @ima4butimfunnyy.

And @keymoments1 agrees with the “everyone, every time” policy in order to avoid hurt feelings. “Don’t make us feel bad just card everybody every single time,” she says.

While one other user, @aimeelovespiano, is a little suspicious when she gets carded, writing, “I am 53 and I rarely drink. But I did get carded 6 months ago and nearly fainted. The woman said I looked under 35! Probably lying. But this wasn’t a tipping situation lol, it was a store. If it was a restaurant I would think it was for tips!”

So bartenders take note: A little light flattery in the form of state compliance might boost your tips numbers for the night.

Who Gets ID’d, What Are The Guidelines?

Because it is illegal to sell alcohol to an individual under 21, there are potentially severe legal consequences for the seller and the business. A bar, restaurant, or nightclub caught selling alcohol to underage customers can face fines, the loss of a liquor license, or even closure, reports the trade site Bar and Restaurant.

So how to decide who gets asked for state-issued identification? Consistency is key, advises Jeffrey Jannarone, a public safety practices expert and expert witness. His advice is to establish consistent rules and then augment them with proper training and tools. ID scanners and UV lights can help spot the increasingly plausible-looking fakes generated by AI.

“Implement comprehensive training programs that cover different types of IDs, common security features, and tactics used in fake IDs,” he says. And when it comes to counterfeit identification, he says stay up to date on the new trends. He notes, “AI-generated identity documents and synthetic IDs have increased fraud attempts by over 20% in recent years, according to several fraud intelligence reports.”

Jannarone also suggests that servers and bartenders ID anyone who looks under the age of 30. This vastly reduces the ability of a polished-looking 20-year-old to slip in unnoticed. And they’re trying; multiple campus safety studies indicate that “nearly 32% of college students admit to owning or using a fake ID,” reports Signzy.

Finally, he says to have clear steps for staff to follow when deciding not to serve a customer. With these precautions in place, the night is safer for everyone.

BroBible reached out to @babyloveee650 via TikTok direct message and with a comment on the post. We will update this article if she responds.