Pennsylvania Police Respond To Report Of Exorcism ‘For The Dead Trees’ At Home Depot As Lumber Prices Plummet

Home Depot Lumber

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  • Pennsylvania police responded to an exorcism at Home Depot earlier this week.
  • Apparently, exorcisms are not allowed in the lumber aisle.
  • Click HERE for more weird news!

There are places where holding an exorcism is acceptable, and places where holding an exorcism is highly frowned upon. Home Depot, apparently, is the latter. Could have fooled me.

A police report from Dickson City in Lackawanna County, Pennsylvania on Monday afternoon shared the bizarre occurrence.

“3:26pm: Commerce Blvd. @ Home Depot for disorderly people having an exorcism in the lumber isle for the dead trees,” authorities wrote. “They were escorted out of the building.”

Probably for the best.

Dickson City police spoke with the Philly Voice on Thursday and couldn’t help but laugh.

“It was a séance type of thing for the dead,” the officer said.

The individuals were asked to leave but were not charged. Again, probably for the best. Who knows what type of ritual they would have performed on the police.

“There were two people hanging out in the lumber department doing their little exorcism thing,” the officer told The Voice. “Some people at the store started picking up that something was happening that was not necessarily normal. Police were called to the store and they were escorted out of the building.”

A modern day movie.

Price of lumber has been particularly high over the last few weeks due to COVID. As the nation begins to reopen, saw mills are ramping up again and prices are dropping. Perhaps the two exorcists were reacting to the increase in lumber production and hoping to put a stop to it.

No matter what they were doing, it was bizarre and straight out of a horror movie. Or the Lorax. Maybe both? Definitely both.

With all of that being said, I love this move. These two exorcists were just sitting at home and thought “let’s head down to the local Home Depot and get those evil spirits out of the lumber.” What a life.

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