Rich Brian, Age 20, Is Being Cancelled For Tweets He Wrote When He Was TWELVE

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You guys know Rich Brian? He used to go by Rich Chigga until it was time to put together his college applications. He’s a young guy who blew up on Vine and YouTube with some rap songs that I wanted to hate but honestly, they’re fun. He raps about women choking on thick cocks while wearing his fannypack. His music video for Dat $tick has 150 million views. He’s just one of those phenomenons that I’m slightly too old to understand. But I can’t hate; the kid is impressive.

Today, in the least surprising news ever, the internet police found a few tweets he wrote in 2014 that haven’t aged well. He drops a couple hard Ds, some Fs, and I think an R in there somewhere.

A few things to keep in mind: first, Brian didn’t speak English until he was like 11. It’s a bit hard to follow but according to his Wiki page, he learned English through watching rap vids on YouTube. Is it really surprising, then, that Brian tweeted this shit? If I learned to speak English through Rosetta Stone Lil Kim, there’s a strong chance people might be offended by my language. Secondly, we’re talking about a thirteen year old. Thirteen. Donte Divincenzo was fourteen when he tweeted lyrics with the N-word, and that dude grew up speaking English as his first language. I think if we can let Donte off the hook, we shouldn’t even look twice at young Brian’s history.

I had hoped that the internet sleuths that comb through decades of celebrity tweets would have taken a step back in these difficult times. Thought maybe they’d find a puzzle, hop on a zoom date, or do anything that normal people are doing to try to find happiness. Guess not. Silly me for having hope. These private investigators won’t let a worldwide health crisis stop them from ruining a 20-year-old’s life. The cancel game doesn’t sleep.