Can you be a big spender if you’re not actually spending? That’s the question one Tennessee bartender’s recent guest interaction prompts.
Delaney Doyle (@delaneydoylee) is a law student who bartends on the side. Typically, her TikToks are quasi-sociological observations about bartender hairstyles and their corresponding tip totals. But this time, she came to deliver a rant, and it’s raising questions of respectful guests.
In her video, Doyle doesn’t mince words. “If you can afford top-shelf tequila shots, you can afford to tip your bartender more than $1.13,” she says. She feels so strongly about it that she’s written in the caption, “I’d rather u just not tip than be disrespectful.”
Then she proceeds to the story. With more than 21,700 views at time of writing, it seems like her situation strikes a chord. She says a pair of young women, 22 or 23, came in one night. They ordered strawberry mango margaritas, and one of them complained it wasn’t sweet enough. So Doyle reprepared it for her guest and returned it.
The duo next ordered food and decided that they wanted top-shelf tequila shots. “Awesome, great, let me grab those for you,” says the bartender.
Then they double-checked the cost, asking, “Wait, how much does that cost again?”
Doyle says she told them the price, and they decided, “OK, whatever, it’s fine.” Because, real talk, isn’t everything fine after a margarita?
Respect Is A 2-Way Street
The pair then decided they “actually want to transfer to a table.” Doyle told them it’s no problem for them to shift. She just needed them to close the tab they started with her. “I can’t transfer a bill from the bar to an actual table,” she explained.
And though the girls purportedly said, “Yeah. Sure,” after Doyle spilt the tab, the guests started playing “Mean Girls” games.
The first guest’s tab comes to $63.75. “She hands me three $20 dollar bills, and a $5,” explains the bartender. “And tells me, ‘You can keep the change.'”
That’s a tip of $1.25. But Doyle is hopeful, thinking that perhaps the guest will leave more. Then she overheard the customer who just paid whispering to her friend, “Hahaha, I told her she could keep the change.”
Doyle said they were laughing about the barely-there tip.
Now, it’s time for the second guest to pay. Her bill is larger, at “$110-something,” says Doyle. The guest’s method to settle the bill? With a $100, a $10, and a $1. Plus, she says she wants the change.
At this point, the bartender says the problem isn’t the 0.625% tip. It’s the laughter.
“Don’t tell me to keep the f—— change, ’cause clearly you need that [money] more than I do,” she says to her video’s audience—not to the guests.
In an email to BroBible, Doyle says she remained professional throughout, as she would for any guest. But she did give the new server a heads-up. “Hey just so you know they tipped me 1$ on an almost 200$ bill and laughed about it so just prepare yourself.”
She says she “didn’t do this so that the server would intentionally give them bad service but to let them know to maybe not get their hopes up and just be wary.”
Are You Renting The Seat When You Dine Out?
The tipping conundrum isn’t going to be solved in the comments section of a TikTok, no matter how many views it gets. But people came ready anyway—hating on everything from bartenders to tipping itself.
But there’s one person who introduces a possible new way of looking at tipping. “I recently talked to a customer who said he tips good for the drinks, but he also thinks about it as paying ‘rent’ so he also tips on top of that for how long he sits. Like that’s so brilliant and everyone should do that,” said Avery (@averyavery191).
While @st0ned.succubus offered a tip on keeping your bartender happy, writing, “I be tipping FAT on my first drink so my bartender takes care of me. for two reasons 1) I never have to wait for a drink 2) in case I forget a tip later in the night i know I already tipped $20+.”
Then, @lippillow1 enters the chat, saying, “Just because we can afford top shelf dosent [sic] mean that we have to tip. It’s not our responsibility to tip you or owe you anything like that. If you don’t like not getting tipped find another job.”
What’s The Big Deal?
It might not seem that major: Not tipping a server doesn’t mean they lose money, right? In some situations, that’s not true. According to Doyle, her restaurant uses a system known as a “sales-based tip out.” That means that a percentage of her tips, based on the total sales amount, is pooled so “servers share a portion of their tips with the support staff.”
So when she doesn’t get tipped, it is now costing her money to serve. That’s not service; that’s a tipsy math problem.
@delaneydoylee I’d rather u just not tip than be disrespectful #serverrant #bartenderstories #tippingculture #tipping #disrespecful