Ya know, I don’t know, man. Who does, really? Is any of this actually happening? Is this all just a simulation? The Matrix? Is this the real life, is this just fantasy? Someone secretly slipping us all microdoses of acid?
Here’s the point I’m trying to make — how in the fuck else do you explain this consistent future-predicting nonsense that The Simpsons has been pulling for the last two decades? HOW SWAY?!
I’ve never related to Kanye West — who among us has, especially recently — but his legendary on-air frustration with Sway is how I feel *every fucking time* The Simpsons decides to just casually drop one of these fucking Back to the Future nukes square on our dome pieces.
Tired of me rambling? Forgive me, it’s the Monday after the Super Bowl and I had my first beers since 2019 due to the mythical beast known as Dry January, and woooo buddy, I had a night. But I digress, thankfully. My point is that, once again, The Simpsons have creepily predicted a massive societal event years and years before it actually occurs. And this time, it’s the fucking Coronavirus.
This Coronavirus discovery is just the latest example of truly bizarre ESPN from those yellow fuckers, as there are dozens and dozens of examples on the internet of the series’ truly preposterous penchant for precognition.
From the Donald Trump presidency to the fiery ending of Game of Thrones to Disney actually buying the very studio that owned the series, The Simpsons have been doing this for so long that it’s getting to a breaking point where we, as a society, must rise up and demand answers.
Eric is a New York City-based writer who still isn’t quite sure how he’s allowed to have this much fun for a living and will tell anyone who listens that Gotham City is canonically in New Jersey. Follow him on Twitter @eric_ital for movie and soccer takes or contact him email@example.com