Anna Faris Fakes An Orgasm On Television And It Might Make Your Dick Shrivel

Women fake orgasms. Sometimes they aren’t in the mood, but will put on a great show so that their man doesn’t have to fake an orgasm. Team player right there. However, the lovely Anna Faris thinks that porn may have ruined the sound of the female orgasm.

On Tuesday night, Faris was on The Late Late Show with James Corden promoting her new podcast Anna Faris Is Unqualified. The podcast gives “questionable relationship advice from completely unqualified celebrity types.” One man asked Anna how he could tell if his girlfriend is faking orgasms or not.

The Hollywood actress believes that men are so accustomed to the over-the-top, squirting, screaming female orgasms that they can’t even recognize a real orgasm. Anna was a true sport and faked a porn star orgasm on national television and well, in her own words it sounded like a “dying hyena” or like a rusted child swing that creaks because it has an adolescent rhinoceros is sitting in it. Let’s hope Anna doesn’t do that when she’s in the sack with Chris Pratt.

This is cutesy and Anna’s orgasm noises definitely skirt around any FCC indecency regulations because it sounded more like a Canadian goose was being run over by each axle of an 18-wheeler, but it’s not fair to paint a broad stroke that this is what actual porn stars sound like.

Now you might be able to make the claim that adult movie starlets of the 1980s had atrocious fake orgasm sounds. However, the actors and actresses in the porn industry have come to make their movies much more believable since the days where the plot was a pizza delivery man brings a “sausage pizza” to a lonely housewife and they bang. Do porn stars embellish their mating calls? Of course, but Claire Danes pumps up her crying face when portraying bipolar CIA Operative Carrie Mathison on the TV show Homeland and everybody lauds her overacting.