A Ranking Of Every Led Zeppelin Song Ever From Worst To Best And No ‘Stairway’ Isn’t No. 1

by 4 years ago
Led Zeppelin with jet

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Just yesterday, the discussion of the world’s love of ranking stuff came up in our office chat. Everyone agreed every online ranking of everything ever is basically horse shit. Any ranking of anything is completely subjective and the work of one, or numerous, people. Those people are giving their opinion, an opinion which, more than half the world will disagree with.

But as long as the internet exists, so will posts ranking things that don’t need ranking. Take for example this list of every Led Zeppelin song ranked from best to worst done by Bill Wyman at Vulture.

What follows is my list of the band’s songs, from worst to best. The criteria? I hope the reasoning speaks for itself. The on-record result — the sounds, the playing, the meanings — are really what matters, though the historical importance of a few tracks counts as well. Some adjustments are made as we go along, as you will see.

The list below sticks to the work the group recorded as a complete unit. Please let me know in the comments if I made any mistakes.

Oh I’m sure you’ll hear it, Bill! Not from me but from thousands upon thousands of Zeppelin aficionados who’re convinced you’re an idiot. I don’t think you’re an idiot. I think it’s a solid list, one based on your opinion. I’m a huge Zeppelin fan and your list doesn’t bother me in the slightest. I like it just for the fact that Stairway to Heaven isn’t number 1. Had you put Stairway at the top I would have immediately dismissed the entire fucking piece.

While I urge everyone to go check out the list, I’ll give a SPOILER as to Bill’s all time worst and all time best without including number one because that would just be a dick move.

5 Worst Led Zeppelin Songs: 74) Moby Dick 73) Royal Orleans 72) Hots On For Nowhere 71) Hats Off to (Roy) Harper 70) The Crunge. 

5 Best Led Zeppelin Songs: 5) Dazed and Confused, 4) Stairway to Heaven, 3) Whole Lotta Love 2) Good Times, Bad Times and you’ll have to go click for number 1.

Here’s my quick list of the greatest Led Zeppelin songs of all time:

1.) Whole Lotta Love because I once got a great BJ while it was playing in the background

2.) Every other Zeppelin song that didn’t involve me finishing

Feel free to argue with me in the comments.

[via Vulture]

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