Brazil’s Miss BumBum Winner Begs Lionel Messi Not To Retire With Hot Insta Pics After He Blocked Her For Being Thirsty

Lionel Messi

Shutterstock / Christian Bertrand

You bros may remember back in April we brought you the story of Lionel Messi and his girlfriend blocking Brazil’s 2015 Miss BumBum contest winner Suzy Cortes on social media after she bombarded Messi with sexy pictures of herself in his jersey.

Cortes chalked her thirst up to avid fandom, but managed to deliver a parting jab to Antonella Roccuzzo, the soccer superstar’s 28-year-old girlfriend, by calling her “jealous” and expressing that she’s “surprised that she isn’t more sure of herself.”

Welp, after Messi shanked a penalty kick on Sunday night that essentially caused Argentina to lose to Chile in the Copa America for the second year in a row,  the record-breaking forward announced he was retiring from international soccer.

The 29-year-old’s retirement did not go without some pushback from our old friend Suzy Cortes, who posted a series of Instagram photos trying to get back on Messi’s radar.

Rough translation:

“The Argentinian genius who plays for my Barcelona is full of character and humility which is somewhat different to the Brazilian team. Don’t go Lio. Come on Barca.”

Cortes doubled down by captioning the below photo with “If you didn’t like the first post then enjoy the second.”

If you’re still not convinced she needs Lionel Messi like we need air to breathe, then consider the onslaught of Messi-related Insta posts she’s been posting to her 640,000 followers.

*Messi frantically hits ‘unblock’*

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Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.