It’s Time to Start Your Engines for the Hottie Index

Danica Patrick
Patrick normally gets attention because she’s one of the few females in motor sports and she’s the only one other than Ashley Force who is attractive. She finally did something on the track this week by winning the pole for this weekend’s Daytona 500. She didn’t even need to blow the mystery honorary starter to get it either. The real question is, what will happen if her new boyfriend, Ricky Stenhouse Jr., is going head-to-head with her on the final stretch? Will he bitch out because he wants to get laid or will he show Danica who wears the fire-resistant pants in the relationship?

Chrissy Teigen
Teigen is a BroBible favorite, so don’t get angry at us as we include her in another Hottie Index. We just feel she deserves a little limelight now and again because she gets lost in the supermodel shuffle and she’s clearly one of the coolest ones out there. She looks pretty damn good in a bikini too, as we saw in her recent pics for Beach Bunny Swimwear. Who knew Utah could come through with girls like this?

Jenna Dewan
Is it weird to think a pregnant chick looks kind of hot and you would bang her? I figure J.Camm would probably do it and with the way Dewan looks, you probably would too. She looked pretty fuckable in her pictures for this month’s Esquire. If the name doesn’t sound familiar at first, I’ll point out that she’s the broad married to Channing Tatum. Her actual acting and dancing career isn’t noteworthy enough to warrant acclaim itself, but she’s certainly on our radar with her looks and famous husband.

Berenice Marlohe
The Brit Awards, the U.K. version of the Grammy’s, happened in London this week, which means we have another opportunity to ogle celebrities as they walk down a red carpet. There were a few who stood out and since we don’t reward prudes like Taylor Swift more than we have to, Marlohe gets our nod for doing the best celebrity work on this night. The Bond girl tantalized during her role in “SkyFall,” but hopefully that’s not the last we see of her in a major motion picture.

Diane Lane
We end this week’s Hottie Index with a straight up MILF. And now she’s a MILF who’s getting a divorce from husband Josh Brolin. Maybe Brolin thinks Lane has peaked and wants to trade her in for a younger model. Or maybe he was upset he couldn’t manhandle Lane like Olivier Martinez did in “Unfaithful.” Either way, the divorce means Lane will need to keep in great shape going forward and that’s just fine with us. I think she really needs to make Brolin jealous by hitting the beach in a bikini or doing another sex scene, don’t you?