Fellas, if you’re gonna be cheap, don’t do it on Valentine’s Day. Also, don’t use fake, made-up currency. Also, there’s no such thing as a trillion dollar bill. Bro, you’re the dumbest.
Meet Michael Williams of Sumter, South Carolina. On Valentine’s Day, Williams went to the local Applebee’s for lunch. He wined and dined, had himself some chili cheese nachos and some baby back ribs. When the bill came, Williams pulled out his debit card. Sadly, it was denied. So he did what any bro in his situation would do—he pulled out his trillion dollar bill. Because his billion dollar bill wasn’t as crisp, apparently.
Sick move man. How do you walk around with that kind of cash? I’d be sweatin’ like a hooker in church. I mean, your one bill could shrink the U.S. debt by 6%. I’d be scared of government assassins and shit.