“Now say my name.”
“Hitlerberg.”
“You’re goddamn right.”
Adolf Hitler probably wouldn’t be too keen on that name, but oh well, fuck that guy. However he had some similarities to Walter White, in that they were both powerful meth kingpins.
It has long been rumored that Hitler got his Nazi soldiers addicted to meth. A new book, The Total Rush; Drugs in the Third Reich by German writer Norman Ohler/em>, details the widespread use by the Nazis of a narcotic called Pervitin, which was a precursor to crystal meth. The drugs were first tested on inmates at Sachsenhausen concentration camp and patented in 1937 by Berlin-based Temmler Werke pharmaceuticals.
Das Führer wanted his troops to be wide-eyed and vigorous, able to Blitzkrieg all across Europe without stopping. So he provided them meth. A LOT OF METH. Nazis were supplied with 35 million pills of meth — on one occasion alone!
The German soldiers called the drug “Panzerschokolade,” or “tank chocolate,” and believed it was harmless; a simple stimulant just “like coffee.” Soon Hitler had a peppy army of tweakers that required less food and less sleep than their enemies. Pervitin was so effective that the drug kept them awake for “days at a time,” allowing them to hike as many as 36 miles in a day. Studies showed that the drug also gave users heightened self-confidence and self-awareness. However some soldier who used the meth died of heart failure and others committing suicide during psychotic phases.
“Berlin was a Breaking Bad drug kitchen for Hitler and the Nazis long before the TV show was ever devised,” said Ohler.
In 1941, Pervitin was outlawed and declared an illegal drug. However the use of the “miracle drug” didn’t stop by Germany’s mighty military. Records from the Wehrmacht, Germany’s World War II army, indicate that some 200 million Pervitin pills were issued to the German troops between 1939 and 1945.
While Hitler may not have used Pervitin, he supposedly loved Eukodal, a pharmaceutical cousin of heroin, as well as a shitload of other drugs. Ohler, an award-winning novelist and screenplay writer, states in his book that he was most shocked by Hitler’s rampant drug use, an addiction that he says led him to “maintain his delusion until the end.”
Hitler’s personal physician, Theodor Morell, prescribed a plethora of various substances to Herr Wolf. The medical diary of Morell AKA “Herr Reich Injection Master” was discovered after the war, and it showed that Hitler was administered drugs, vitamins, hormones and serums usually via injections up to 20 times a day. Fucking junkie.
There are 82 substances in 28 different mixtures on the list of Hitler’s cocktails including amphetamines, barbiturates, bromides, caffeine, cocaine eye drops, E. coli (Eww), Mutaflor (pills prescribed to Hitler for flatulence), methamphetamine, morphine and a Viagra-like testosterone booster made from the bull semen and prostate glands of young bulls. Some experts believe mainlining those dangerous and volatile concoctions are the reason Hitler was in poor health, why he thought he could conquer the world and why he was such an insufferable prick when he crashed. But at least he wasn’t farting up a storm thanks to the good doctor.
What could have been if Hitler’s drug of choice was weed instead of heroin.