Sorry, Bros, but I’ve got some disappointing news for all us people who put back 6-10 drinks a day and then take solace in the fact that numerous studies have found that regular, moderate alcohol consumption is good for individual health.
“Six to ten is moderate. One to two, that doesn’t even make me feel anything, and if I’m not feeling the benefits, how could I be getting any of the benefits, you know what I’m saying? Nothing wrong with a couple beers than a couple glasses of whiskey. Helps me sleep. Plus, uuhhh, extra flavonoids, lots and lots of flavonoids. Those are good, right? ”
Well, unfortunately, ALL (we mean like ALL) those studies that found moderate alcohol consumption was good for you were … not accurate. Here’s CNN:
Over the years we’ve all seen the studies that show a glass of wine a day may help protect you from developing heart disease, will help with cancer and keep type 2 diabetes away, and will ultimately help you live longer. But this new research may be a buzz kill for those who like to drink in moderation. Toasting to your health may actually be an oxymoron
What this study did was analyze the methods of all those studies that found alcohol had a positive effect on mortality.
Pretty much all of them forgot that people who say they don’t drink may have, you know, drank in the past.
It’s not that the other scientists were working under the influence of the industry or something more potent. This latest study found that when those other studies divide people into groups they typically put them into common categories: heavy drinkers, moderate drinkers, occasional drinkers and abstainers.
What the new study found is that the abstainer group isn’t only made up of people who have never touched a drop. Instead, some in this group may be recovering alcoholics. Some may also be abstaining now because of a health condition. In general, those two groups of people in the abstainer category are not as healthy as those who are lifelong teetotalers, research shows. That means these less healthy people skew the data. So, the moderate drinkers end up looking healthier by default. Make sense?
Stupid fucking scientists with their stupid fucking bullshit. Getting my hopes up like that. That said, for now, scientists do agree that while alcohol may not be great for you, ehhh, it may not kill you.
Ultimately, what this study is saying is that there are limitations to what we know. It’s possible that abstainers and moderate drinkers may have similar long-term health results.
There are many additional studies that show heart-protective effects of alcohol and other studies show that there are psychological benefits to having a drink every once in a while as stress relief.
Which will probably be proved bunk in a bit, but until then, drink away with the knowledge that these other studies are 100%, perfectly accurate.