Young Boy Gets TRUCKED By Passing Van And Can Someone Explain To Me How He’s Still Alive?

Ummm ya I’m going to need an explanation on this one. We have any readers who are doctors? Or just anyone who has a logical, reasonable explanation for how an eight-year-old kid could get legitimately run over by a van and bounce back up like he tripped on his shoelace. I would be less shocked if this kid walked on water. At least I can attribute that to buoyancy or whatever. I don’t know, bros. Today left is right, up is down, and dead is alive.

P.S. This post took me 20 minutes longer than it should have because I had no idea how to spell ‘buoyancy.’ Like I was so far off that even grammar check was like “uh, ya I’m fresh out of ideas, bro. You’re pathetic.” My first three attempts were buoancy, boiancy, boyantcy). Simmy, sammy, swammy, SAMSONITE! I was was way off!

Matt Keohan Avatar
Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.