There’s Now An ‘Erotic Carp Calendar’ If You Get Off On Topless Chicks Holding Ugly Fish

If you’re into hot chicks (sometimes naked) holding the ugliest fish known to man, then do I have the perfect calendar for you! There’s now a German ‘Erotic Carp Calendar’ featuring hot chicks (some in bikinis, some naked) holding giant carp.

Even if carp & bare naked ladies aren’t your thing, perhaps you know a fisherman who might be into such a thing and you might consider this as the perfect Secret Santa Gift.

From the German site BILD:

The twelve sharp images shot at his own pond at home a French photographer. And do not worry: the carp live, were repeatedly moistened when shooting with water to make them suffer as little stress.

Regularly were the models cleaned of scales and slime, to keep them from glibschen the fish with a flourish of his hands.

In the end it was a real fisherman dream! The Carp Calendar 2015 Carponizer found on the Internet for 18,95 €.

So the fish were unharmed and the models had the scales scrubbed off them to preserve the purity of the photoshoot, got it. Here’s the Amazon link if you’re interested in purchasing the most erotic carp calendar ever shot.

And before you pigeon hole the ‘erotic carp calendar’ as a niche gift without any real market share, listen to this little tidbit from The Daily Dot:

Although one might assume the Erotic Carp Calendar is catering to a pretty small niche of, I don’t know, boobie/angling enthusiasts, there seems to be a pretty large market for this type of product. The British camping gear company Total Fishing Gear, for instance, has also released a cheesecake fishing calendar featuring busty ladies posing suggestively with carp, and there’s also a “Beauty and the Bass” calendar that boasts “bass, boats, and babes.”

We don’t know whether Carponizer’s calendar is trying to cater to a little-known carp paraphilia, or if it’s intended as a bro-y nod to the (inaccurate) parallels drawn between fish and vaginal odor.

Aaaaaaaand I’m done here. Carp fetishes? Fish odors? What the hell is wrong with people?!?


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