If the local police squad is:
A. Waiting outside your house for you to come out
And,
B. Following you on Twitter
Plus,
C. Replying to the tweets you’re sending as you hide in your home
You’re more likely than not fucked. If watching Die Hard every Christmas season has taught me anything, it’s that they’re only talking to you politely as a distraction while mini SWAT tanks roll up to the front of your house to break down your door. Or maybe the Frisco Police Department are just full of really, really polite officers:
The whole frisco pd is here fuck 12
— perѕιan wнιтeвoy (@TristenVahedian) September 13, 2015
“”If you’re trying to avoid jail maybe slappin’ your dick around your phone while the Twitter app is open isn’t the best idea. In any case, Frisco PD thought they would at least try to get him to come outside using the power of politeness:
@TristenVahedian Please come out of the house and talk to us. Thank you.
— Frisco Police (@FriscoPD) September 13, 2015
Awww please AND thank you? They’re pulling out all the stops for this guy – but in the end it didn’t matter.
@FriscoPD I’m gone homie
— perѕιan wнιтeвoy (@TristenVahedian) September 13, 2015
“”
Or maybe he’s just trying to mindfuck them and he’s actually hiding in a closet wearing only his underwear fucking around on Twitter. 50/50 chance either way.
[H/T Elite Daily]