No Matter WhatAwful Life Choices You Make, You’ll Never Be This Woman Who Allegedly Beat Up Her Twin Over A Vibrator

Via Facebook

The only reason I can think of that would make fighting with your twin sister over a vibrator be maybe “okay” would be if said vibrator were made of solid gold. That’s it. Any reason other than that is insufficient and a surefire indicator that you are a living dumpster who should have been swallowed instead of birthed.

And yet here we have Heidi Creamer, 48, who allegedly punched her twin sister in the face while fighting over a vibrator and her boyfriend. Does anyone wanna take a moment to guess where they’re from? Aybody? No? Well color me shocked they’re from Florida.

Creamer, 48, allegedly punched her sister in the face, causing the victim to fall to the floor.

The victim tried to kick Creamer away, but Creamer allegedly continued to punch, scratch and pull her sister’s hair, according to the Sheriff’s Office…

When a deputy arrived, she noticed the victim had blood on her face.

The deputy arrested Creamer and read her her rights.

“She began screaming she was fighting with her sister over a vibrator and her boyfriend,” the deputy wrote in an arrest report.

Via Herald Tribune

Creamer has been charged with domestic battery and was released from jail on Monday after posting $500 bail. No word yet on which sister walked away with the vibrator and the boyfriend.


[H/T MTV News and Herald Tribune, image via Facebook]