For some people the act of tailgating isn’t about boozing and eating at all. There’s a certain breed of man that lives to tailgate but ONLY because they want to show the world how much f*cking better they are at tailgating than every other human being alive. The beef and brats they cook up make everyone else’s food taste like dirt, they cocktails they serve are straight out of a Las Vegas lounge. This is the type of man who’s going to be showing up on Saturdays and Sundays this Fall with a skinned watermelon, the kind of man who can’t keep his Big Swinging Richard contained within his Wranglers and needs to show the world how f*cking over-the-top his tailgate is.
I’ll never be that type of person, because frankly there’s not really anything in life that I’m all that passionate about. I guess maybe I get that amped up on fishing, but that’s about it. That’s why it’s important for people like me to make sure and maintain a few friends in life that are addicted to tailgating. I love this ‘skinning a watermelon trick’ but I don’t love it enough to ever spend the time doing it myself…But that doesn’t mean I won’t get to experience this at some point in the very near future. For those of you still reading you’re about to get the payoff: just like you should, I’m sending this article to everyone I know who I believe has the drive to actually pull off this ‘skin a watermelon’ trick, telling them about this new thing they’ll love. Guaranteed within the next 2 months someone I’ve sent this post to will do pull off this watermelon skinning trick and I’ll be there to reap the benefits…And I suggest you do the same.