Some Human Stain Vandalized the Lincoln Memorial

The Lincoln Memorial is currently closed after vandals splattered green paint all over the base of the iconic 19-foot statue. Someone hates ‘Murrica.

Officials are hopeful the Memorial will be re-opened today.

What should they do when they find the offender? Tar and feather? Water torture? Force him to marry Mary Todd? Have him try to catch a penny dropped from the Washington Monument?

The possibilities are really endless.

[H/T: CNN]

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