I’m not against a vegetarian lifestyle, I’m only against vegetarians who get all up in my shit to tell me what I should or shouldn’t eat. Especially those vegetarian extremists who publicly shame people on how consuming meat is unethical. I have no problem with chowing down on some crispy vegetable pakoras, sriracha quinoa bites, or brown butter gnocchi with mushrooms and pine nuts. But sometimes I crave a thick, juicy medium-rare burger with blood dripping down my chin after I sink my sharp canine teeth into all of it’s fatty goodness. I especially lust for a fat burger fried in magnificent animal fat after I have had a few alcoholic beverages. And it appears that I am not alone because even vegetarians can’t help but to covet all that greasy splendor when they are drunk.
A recent study surveyed 1,789 British vegetarians and it turns out they secretly desire that meaty magnificence and give in to their animalistic yearnings. The study found that 34 percent of these weak-willed plant-eaters eat meat when they’re intoxicated during a night out. Hard to dismiss those overwhelming impulses when it tastes so fucking delectable isn’t it?
It gets worse, 34 percent admitted to eating meat EVERY time they get shwasted. The study also found that 26 percent said it happened “fairly often,” and 22 percent said they “rarely” partook in this type of barbaric behavior.
When they did indulge, kebab meat and burgers were the dead animal meat of choice for the hypocritical vegetarians. Other meat products from poor, poor, but delicious animals on the list included bacon, fried chicken and pork sausages. HEATHENS!
The study was done by your one true source for reliable vegetarian research, VoucherCodesPro.
So apparently “meat is murder,” unless you’ve had three paloma cocktails and three Redd’s Apple Ales. Then meat murders that extreme hunger that you have after a night of drinking.