Want To Have Bigger And More Intense Orgasms, Bros? Science Says All You Need To Do Is This One Thing

by 4 years ago
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Every guy knows the first time with a new girl, or a new porn clip, or whatever it is that makes you jizz, is the most explosive. It’s new, it’s fresh, it’s STRANGE. But now science has concluded that those first encounters are also the best orgasms that men have. They cause you to “ejaculate larger volumes of semen, more motile sperm, and more quickly.” All of that sounds good except for the old “that’s never happened to me before” scenario of self-confidence death.

The study, conducted by the Evolutionary Psychological Science, “analyzed ejaculates produced through masturbation with stimulation from sexually explicit films. When males were exposed successively to the same female six times, we saw no change in ejaculate parameters between the first and sixth exposures to the same female. However, ejaculate volume and total motile sperm count significantly increased when males were exposed to a novel female.”

To put that in layman’s terms, “men cum more good with new girl.” Ok, maybe that was move caveman terms than it was laymen’s terms but you get the point.

But it definitely makes sense and far be it from me to argue with science.

Come to think of it…

This might explain why Leonardo DiCaprio has spent the last 20 years throwing his dick into every relevant model. One night, George Clooney probably pulled him aside at some swanky, Gastsby-like party and said, “Yo Leo, you want to cum like a god for the rest of your life? Here’s how you do it…” then he whispered the secret of animalistic cumming into Leo’s ear, unknowingly setting off a chain of events that would make all other men envy his playboy lifestyle.

This also explains why we (see: men) are never able to watch the same clip of porn more than once. Sure, there are exceptions to that. Those of us who believe in love might have what it takes to muster two, maybe three, viewings of the same porn clip, but even we can’t fathom watching it more than that. We’re only human. And as humans all we want to do is cum buckets of more motile sperm.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to go research to see if I even want “more motile sperm.”

[H/T Metro]


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